Badger
10-31-2008, 11:00 AM
Roger's Profanisaurus, The Magna Farta (A trip through British vulgarity).
These are extracts from a book I've begged the wife to get me for Christmas. This is a must for anyone wishing an insight into British humour.
avril n. The lavatory. Named after the popular singer Avril Latrine. e.g. "I'm off to the Avril".
back pocket rocket n. A turd that shoots out of your arse at speed and disappears round the bend, leaving no trace whatsoever and making you wonder whether you did a crap at all or if you just imagined the whole thing.
biggie smalls n. Fat lasses’ knickers.
costume drama n. The frantic behaviour of a woman who cannot decide what to wear for a party.
Fulham handshake n. A friendly greeting exchanged between two gentlemen in a public lavatory cubicle.
kerrangatang n. A large, hairy, heavy metal enthusiast.
kidney prodder n. During an act of penetrative affection, a particularly impressive thrust.
potato fat n. The starchy gloop that issues from a gentleman’s spuds when he mashes them a bit.
saga louts n. Packs of tea-fuelled pensioners travelling by coach who lay waste to garden centres and stately home gift shops.
....The Perfect Christmas gift!!
These are extracts from a book I've begged the wife to get me for Christmas. This is a must for anyone wishing an insight into British humour.
avril n. The lavatory. Named after the popular singer Avril Latrine. e.g. "I'm off to the Avril".
back pocket rocket n. A turd that shoots out of your arse at speed and disappears round the bend, leaving no trace whatsoever and making you wonder whether you did a crap at all or if you just imagined the whole thing.
biggie smalls n. Fat lasses’ knickers.
costume drama n. The frantic behaviour of a woman who cannot decide what to wear for a party.
Fulham handshake n. A friendly greeting exchanged between two gentlemen in a public lavatory cubicle.
kerrangatang n. A large, hairy, heavy metal enthusiast.
kidney prodder n. During an act of penetrative affection, a particularly impressive thrust.
potato fat n. The starchy gloop that issues from a gentleman’s spuds when he mashes them a bit.
saga louts n. Packs of tea-fuelled pensioners travelling by coach who lay waste to garden centres and stately home gift shops.
....The Perfect Christmas gift!!