Dave Predicts Your Future.....

[Dave the Rave]

Some peeps said to me a while back, post a thread in which you ask people to post, asking me to try and predict their future.

Well, I got me crystal ball now, so any of yous wanna know what's in store for you, just ask away.....

Dave the fortune teller will reveal all....

http://www.newmoon.uk.com/divination/CB1.jpg

[Kurt Cobain]

well tell me my future almighty dave :D
it better be good

[uchiha.itachi]

dave...
my gf and me are happy together and married,
will we be together untill the sun sets the last time in our lives?

[Dave the Rave]

well tell me my future almighty dave :D
it better be good

Yes Kurt. You will be shortly resurrected as the Second Messiah, and reform Nirvana.

[Dave the Rave]

dave...
my gf and me are happy together and married,
will we be together untill the sun sets the last time in our lives?

Yep. And your loins shall so fertile, that thy girlfriend's womb will bear you much fruit. I see children. And grandchildren. And great grandchildren.

Oh you are so blessed, my Brother!!!

[SCOUSE_NAZI]

Dave will David Duke successfully overthrow obama at the next elections and implement the fourth reich on the USA and thenEurope will follow suite :D

[Dave the Rave]

Dave will David Duke successfully overthrow obama at the next elections and implement the fourth reich on the USA and thenEurope will follow suite :D

Alas, no, my poor lil scouse lad. I see the initials HMP, and you wailing and moaning, and grinding your teeth....

[Kurt Cobain]

Yes Kurt. You will be shortly resurrected as the Second Messiah, and reform Nirvana.

Sounds legit :D

you're better as that old guy with his 2 crystal balls :lol:

[SCOUSE_NAZI]

Alas, no, my poor lil scouse lad. I see the initials HMP, and you wailing and moaning, and grinding your teeth....

The whole man love bumming thing doesnt happen in English prisons, sorry to disappoint you lad :lol:

[Dave the Rave]

Sounds legit :D

you're better as that old guy with his 2 crystal balls :lol:

Thank you, my child, for your kind words. A fortune teller praised is a fortune teller indeed.

[ρøятəя]

Dave! (:
I wanna know when it's gonna be my wedding... :D

[Kurt Cobain]

Almighty dave, me and Porter have a love/hate relationship ..
so far its only been hate :( when will the love come

[JAK]

Dave, wot will the lotto numbers be for saterday?

[Execution_Style]

Tell me my future Dave!

[rapewolf]

DAVE...

Will me and ZYKRON ever push the twin beds together???

That pile of JEREMYS underwear he likes to SNIFF is quite a huge pile. We might need a new bed...

[ρøятəя]

Almighty dave, me and Porter have a love/hate relationship ..
so far its only been hate :( when will the love come

:lol!:
Shuddup, you love it.
http://g-ecx.images-amazon.com/images/G/01/askville/6171170_8568295_mywrite/finger007.gif

[BLAKMANnCHARGE]

Almighty dave, me and Porter have a love/hate relationship ..
so far its only been hate :( when will the love come

oh snap! hahahahaha! :rofl:

[BLAKMANnCHARGE]

Dave, wot will the lotto numbers be for saterday?

you don't need lotto my lady, let old Blaky be your ATM :evilgrin:

[Dave the Rave]

The whole man love bumming thing doesnt happen in English prisons, sorry to disappoint you lad :lol:

Hehe


Dave! (:
I wanna know when it's gonna be my wedding... :D

Your wedding will be soon, my child, soon. And how beautiful you will look. I see a handsome husband, with whom you will have many children. Five girls, and five boys. The first born child will be a girl. And her middle name will be Unicorn. She will ride horses, and become a champion show-jumper, and be renowned throughout the land....


Almighty dave, me and Porter have a love/hate relationship ..
so far its only been hate :( when will the love come

The love is not far away, oh Kurt my child....


Dave, wot will the lotto numbers be for saterday?

In my crystal ball, I see you walking down the street JAK. You stop outside of a takeaway, with a yellow sign. There you will see the wind blow a piece of paper out of a bin next to the takeaway. The paper is a lottery ticket. It is a winning ticket. You will win £10. Sorry it will not be more, JAK my child, but it's better than nowt or a kick up the arse.....


Tell me my future Dave!

You will be known throughout Norway as a bashing chick. All the boys will love you, and many men will chase you, and want you as their bride. You will spend your days in joy and happiness, and live a long and happy life. You are blessed, my sweet one....


DAVE...

Will me and ZYKRON ever push the twin beds together???

That pile of JEREMYS underwear he likes to SNIFF is quite a huge pile. We might need a new bed...

You will push the twin beds together soon Brother Rapey. But neither of you wil sleep in them. Instead you will sit up all night, saying 'Hey!, you're cooler than I thought!' to one another. And in the morning, you will go for a walk in the park. Therein is a conservatory, with a greenhouse-style room. And the room contains a CACTUS, which you will both admire.....

[ρøятəя]

Your wedding will be soon, my child, soon. And how beautiful you will look. I see a handsome husband, with whom you will have many children. Five girls, and five boys. The first born child will be a girl. And her middle name will be Unicorn. She will ride horses, and become a champion show-jumper, and be renowned throughout the land....
What... WHAT... WHAAAT?
Kids...?

HELL NO!
N-E-V-E-R.
It would be painful... :(

http://media.247sports.com/Uploads/Avatars/914/30326.gif

But yeah, he's super handsome... :love:
:heart:

[Dave the Rave]

What... WHAT... WHAAAT?
Kids...?

HELL NO!
N-E-V-E-R.
It would be painful... :(

http://media.247sports.com/Uploads/Avatars/914/30326.gif

But yeah, he's super handsome... :love:
:heart:

He is sooooo handsome and you are sooooo beautiful, that the kids will come. Mother Nature takes her course, my sweet one.....

[ρøятəя]

He is sooooo handsome and you are sooooo beautiful, that the kids will come. Mother Nature takes her course, my sweet one.....

¬¬
http://emthegoatpoet.files.wordpress.com/2011/03/scalpelglove.jpg
That's all I need to cut the testicles... (:

[Mr.5050]

I TOLD YOU! :rofl: LOTS OF BABIES! WOO HOO! :D

By the time I'm finished you'll have a punani like the eurotunnel and Flibbles will be a Japanese bullet train :teeth:

Just hold on tight and grit your teeth mi amor :flick:

This train is a one way ride to hubba-hubbaville :lol!:

If you come near me with that thing tho ill chloroform you and carry on regardless :heart:

You'll wake up with a limp and 9mths later you'll have the gest shit you've ever had :evilgrin:

I love you sweetie :flutter:

[ρøятəя]

I TOLD YOU! :rofl: LOTS OF BABIES! WOO HOO! :D

By the time I'm finished you'll have a punani like the eurotunnel and Flibbles will be a Japanese bullet train :teeth:

Just hold on tight and grit your teeth mi amor :flick:

This train is a one way ride to hubba-hubbaville :lol!:

If you come near me with that thing tho ill chloroform you and carry on regardless :heart:

You'll wake up with a limp and 9mths later you'll have the gest shit you've ever had :evilgrin:

I love you sweetie :flutter:

¬¬
You suck... :(

http://i266.photobucket.com/albums/ii269/theogrit/sign%20or%20English%20smilies/2sgn062ignore.gif

[Mr.5050]

¬¬
You suck... :(

http://i266.photobucket.com/albums/ii269/theogrit/sign%20or%20English%20smilies/2sgn062ignore.gif

I do but you'll like it :flick: It's when I bite that you have to be careful ;)

I'm already getting stocked up :D

http://i1223.photobucket.com/albums/dd501/mrssepat/clothes%20for%20babies/Image205-1.jpg

Awwwww! "Mummy porter! Mummy porter! When will tea be ready?"

It has a ring to it :flutter:

[ρøятəя]

I do but you'll like it :flick: It's when I bite that you have to be careful ;)

I'm already getting stocked up :D

http://i1223.photobucket.com/albums/dd501/mrssepat/clothes%20for%20babies/Image205-1.jpg

Awwwww! "Mummy porter! Mummy porter! When will tea be ready?"

It has a ring to it :flutter:

OMG... :lol!:
Just stop it... ¬¬
I'm tempted to pull out my uterus with my own hands if you continue with that baby thing...
But before that... I have to do something. ;)
http://static.photaki.com/-acciones--desvestirse--diarias--pantalon-77232.jpg

[Badger]

The future's unwritten, a man's destiny is his own to make.. at least until those "Damn dirty apes..." take over! :mad!:

http://www.mediacircus.net/pota_________7.jpg

[Mr.5050]

OMG... :lol!:
Just stop it... ¬¬
I'm tempted to pull out my uterus with my own hands if you continue with that baby thing...
But before that... I have to do something. ;)
http://static.photaki.com/-acciones--desvestirse--diarias--pantalon-77232.jpg

Don't pull our your uterus with your hands! :shock:

I can do it with my tongue :flick:

[rapewolf]

I will do it with CACTUS for a small fee...

[Execution_Style]

You suck Dave I am not a girl

[rapewolf]

BUTT you are an ALT, it's OK,

CACTUS will always be waiting for you.

[Execution_Style]

Im not a fucking alt

[rapewolf]

OOOOOOOOOOH, you nasty pasty

[Execution_Style]

OOOOOOOOOOH, you nasty pasty

If I am a alt who am I then?

[Mr.5050]

I will do it with CACTUS for a small fee...

That would leave spines behind... I've got to put something else up there afterwards, you know? :spaz:

[ρøятəя]

Don't pull our your uterus with your hands! :shock:

I can do it with my tongue :flick:

:flick:
:heart:

[Dave the Rave]

The future's unwritten, a man's destiny is his own to make.. at least until those "Damn dirty apes..." take over! :mad!:

http://www.mediacircus.net/pota_________7.jpg

Alas, no Brother Badger, my crystal ball reveals all....


You suck Dave I am not a girl

Yes. But you will have a sex change operation soon hehe. That is your future, my child.

[Badger]

Alas, no Brother Badger, my crystal ball reveals all.....

If you're going to reveal you're crystal balls you're in the wrong thread! :eek:

[Dave the Rave]

If you're going to reveal you're crystal balls you're in the wrong thread! :eek:

Lol, Badger

[HANK]

Dear Dave. What do you think the score will be between Rangers and Maribor tonight? I was gony put on 2-0 Rangers but they bastards Maribor look like they have a goal in them. So it was either 2-0 or 2-1. What you think?

[rapewolf]

DAVE...

Will the FORUM PROPHET CUM back to kick your ass for stealing his bit???

[Dave the Rave]

Dear Dave. What do you think the score will be between Rangers and Maribor tonight? I was gony put on 2-0 Rangers but they bastards Maribor look like they have a goal in them. So it was either 2-0 or 2-1. What you think?

All my crystal ball reveals....is that there will be much kicking of a ball, and a right ball ache of many a gambler hehe. Sorry, my friend....


DAVE...

Will the FORUM PROPHET CUM back to kick your ass for stealing his bit???

That, Rapey my child, is one of the sacred mysteries of revelation hehe.....

[Execution_Style]

This time tell me my future for real asshole!

[ρøятəя]

Dave... :hugz:
When am I going to die...?

[THE MAD HATTER]

dave am i a true alt destroyer

[HANK]

HaHahAHa just aswell i never listened to you Dave. The teddy bears bowed out of Europe like a bunch of chumps!

[rapewolf]

DAVE...


HANK enjoys pokey bum wanks. That is ok, BUTT when you can get your whole fist up there,

is it time to get yourself a fleshlight???


BUTCH DIXON would be proud of him!!!


(P.S I still love you HANK)

[Dave the Rave]

This time tell me my future for real asshole!

I see a prison cell. And Brevik the Norwegian nutter is in the same block as you.....


Dave... :hugz:
When am I going to die...?

Alas, a fortune teller never reveals this to one of his little ones. But, my child, you will have a very long and very happy life....

[1964kns]

Dave so hows it gunna go tonight for me???

[Legion]

What will I have for tea tonight?

[uchiha.itachi]

dave im having dinner tonight but someone else prepares it, what you think it will be?

[Execution_Style]

I see a prison cell. And Brevik the Norwegian nutter is in the same block as you.....



Alas, a fortune teller never reveals this to one of his little ones. But, my child, you will have a very long and very happy life....

Ok that was better, I would like to share a prison block with Breivik

[rapewolf]

DAVE...

JAK has just given me good suck. She was GOOD.

I spuffed in her hair, her eye and some on her face. BUTT she refuses to wash

saying she likes the SMELL of my CUM.


Will she catch all of my STD's???

[Execution_Style]

DAVE...

JAK has just given me good suck. She was GOOD.

I spuffed in her hair, her eye and some on her face. BUTT she refuses to wash

saying she likes the SMELL of my CUM.


Will she catch all of my STD's???

How can you have any STD`s you never even had sex

[uchiha.itachi]

looooooooool

[rapewolf]

How can you have any STD`s you never even had sex

You don't have to have sex to pass STD's,

BUTT

seeing as you have no cock, you wouldn't know that.

FAGGIT

[Execution_Style]

You don't have to have sex to pass STD's,

BUTT

seeing as you have no cock, you wouldn't know that.

FAGGIT

So you admit it, you really never had sex haha what a fucking loser you are

[Dave the Rave]

Dave so hows it gunna go tonight for me???

Its gonna go, K, its gonna goooooooo!


What will I have for tea tonight?

Food, my child, food haha


dave im having dinner tonight but someone else prepares it, what you think it will be?

Gonna be food innit lol


Ok that was better, I would like to share a prison block with Breivik

There you go. There is such a thing as good fortune in life hehe

[1964kns]

Its gonna go, K, its gonna goooooooo!


Sweet thanks dave

[ρøятəя]

Daaave... :D
When am I going to kill those bitches Mandy and Sam...? ;)
I already know... But let's see if you are doing a goow work!
(:

[Legion]

I didn't have tea tonight. You're a fake!