When someone suddenly seizes up and collapses, don't charge in to help by grabbing them unless you're wearing electrically insulated boots.
If struck by a car in China and survive the initial hit, roll to safety fast because he's coming back to accidentally on-purpose, finish you.
Chinese love stabbing people with kitchen cutlery.
Don't sleep on the job. Especially on the floor, guarding ATMs as a security guard, or you might wake up dead.
Jumping off a six story building with a large yellow patio umbrella will NOT help.
And most importantly,
ALWAYS have on clean underwear, because you never know..
Edited by: SC0TT