A man in Kentucky claims a fight over a lawnmower led to his beard being cut off and stuffed in his mouth before he was forced to eat it.
Harvey Westmoreland told police the argument between himself, his brother and two other men started when one of the latter drunkenly offered to buy said grass-cutting tool.
He explained that the pair, James Hill and Troy Holt, had invited him and his brother to their house on the day of the incident in May.
Harvey Westmoreland: ‘Everything went haywire and before I knowed it there was knives, guns…’ (YouTube)
‘My brother was cleaning out the stalls out there for Troy, you know, working for him,’ he remembered.
‘They called and wanted me to come around there and when I got there, I realised they were already drunk.’
In the course of their exchange, Troy apparently offered to buy Harvey’s lawnmower for $250.
‘I paid twenty bucks for it. He thought I was trying to cheat him,’ noted Westmoreland.
‘One thing led to another and, before I knowed it [sic], there were knives and guns and everything just went haywire.
‘They cut my beard and forced me to eat it.’
‘OMG is this for real? It’s like a symphony of stereotypes!’ commented one viewer of YouTube footage of the incident.
‘Yo buddy, where’s Cletus?’ mused another.
‘Sounds like he had a close shave with death,’ was the inevitable quip from another viewer.
Hill and Holt, who pleaded guilty to the attack, are expected to be sentenced in court this week.